This weekend I received some great feedback on the first chapter of my paranormal novel Desert Witch. By great, I don’t mean that everyone thought it was a flawless work of genius. Rather, my fellow writers showed me where the weak points are. And really, that’s what a critique should be. If I know what doesn’t work, I am better able to fix it.
I’m preparing to embark on chapter two, but before I do, I’ve been giving a lot of thought to my antagonist, which in this story is La Llorona, the “weeping woman” of Mexican legend. The legend is that she drowned her children (perhaps to gain the attention of a wealthy man who had no interest in kids), but then, upon realizing what she had done, wept uncontrollably as she searched the river for her lost children.
I have to decide how the legend plays into the story. What parts of the legend do I want to bring into the story? What do I want to add to it? I’m thinking that as antagonist in the story, she is kidnapping and possibly killing children in Sedona. That should make for a scary villain. My main character’s goal is to stop La Llorona and to free, if possible, children she has taken. But how does my protagonist stop her? Energy work? A spell? A magical weapon or amulet? By using her true name? And does my protagonist need to destroy La Llorona or merely transform her into something non-threatening?
I’m also trying to decide if there is something different about how La Llorona responds to men vs. women. Perhaps she can act as a seductress toward men, trying to fill the bottomless pit of her craving. Maybe she seduces them only to try to destroy them, a sort of succubus type character–revenge for having been spurned by a man, blaming him for the loss of her children.
So this is where I am in my planning. I also need to finish writing the short story I’m working on. I’ll keep you posted on how this is going.
On Friday, Glimmer Train is supposed to announce the winners of the their Family Matters contest. I submitted my story Waffle Shoe Wake, so I’ve got my fingers crossed.
It's not really anything like what you are writing, I don't think, but I mentioned I read an urban fantasy based in Tucson. I think anything we write based in Arizona is inherently 'competitve' with other Arizona-based stories. I think you should check it out at some point, maybe. Storm Born by Richelle Mead. Also, I just read Animal Dreams by Barbara Kingsolver which takes place near Tucson, but also has bits of other places like Canyon de Chelly.
I don't know anything about the locale of your story, since I live north of the border, but when I read your description of your antagonist, I had this sneaking sympathy for her. On one hand – she drowned her children. Not good. On the other hand, at some point she realized that she made a horrible mistake. She has a redeeming quality that makes her believable. And I couldn't help thinking about Marian Zimmer Bradley, who took a legandary antagonist (Morgan le Fay) and turned her into the central character in (imho) one of the best Arthurian novels ever.
Thank you, by the way, for pointing me in the direction of Glimmer Train. I have a short story that I'm going to try submitting.
I do intend to make La Llorona a sympathetic antagonist in the end. I look forward to writing this story.
And I look forward to reading it in print one day. It sounds amazing!
I LOVED Mists of Avalon (I should re-read that since it has been ages) and I think La Llorona sounds very intriguing. I love myths and legends dearly. Urban fantasy is one of my favorite genres, such that I tend to abandon anything else I am reading if one of these books comes into my hands, so I too, cannot wait to hear/read more.
Mists of Avalon was a wonderful re-interpretation of the Arthurian legend.